Not Quite What Was Expected

Hi Family and Friends,

I know that this is a long time in coming.

See, each time I wanted to write something, we hit another bump in the road.
After he was discharged from Northwestern Hospital the first time, Dan still had a surgical drain draining his abscess.  It was removed 6 days after being put in and that was just a wee bit too soon.  We ended up back in the hospital.  He was readmitted for a few days while they put him on more antibiotics and re-implanted a surgical drain.  He was supposed to start a new job this week.  Thankfully, they said he could delay until he was better.  He started the following week.

Things seemed to be 'OK' for a bit and then he started experiencing new symptoms.  We travelled back to the ER and he was readmitted for a few days.  He was diagnosed with a antibiotic resistant urinary tract infection.  The doctors assumed that it was irritations from the abscess rubbing and pressing on his bladder.  He was discharged a with a new round of 'killer' antibiotics.

He was given the go ahead to not refill his antibiotic as the abscess was clearing fantastically.  A few days later he was back in the ER.  Luckily, he was not admitted this time.  (I did pack an over-night bag just in case - we actually have one on hand at this point.)  He was given a new round of even more potent antibiotics and we left.  A week later the hospital called and wanted him to be readmitted.  He would need IV antibiotics.  His Super Bug was stumping them.

After a few more days in the hospital, he had his surgical drain removed and a PIC implanted.  The PIC was so that he could be released and we could do IV antibiotics at home.  He was discharged and the following day a nurse came to the house to show us how to administer IV antibiotics at  home.  She stressed keeping the port clean and swabbing it with alcohol whenever it touched anything and she stressed how important it was to not have any air bubbles in the lines.  The PIC lead straight to his heart and air bubbles would be 'BAD.'

I am happy to announce - Dan is killer bacteria free, abscess free, drain free, PIC free and finally has an appetite.

It was a long post to get to my point.  My point is: sometimes things don't happen quite how you expect them to.  Long before this all happened, we did go see a judge.  We did it right before we left for Punta Cana.  We wanted our marriage papers to be in English (and a few other reasons.)  We did not expect to ever celebrate this day as our Marriage as we wanted the day that we shared with our family and friends to be "The Day."  We weren't really trying to hide it but we weren't really broadcasting it either.  In the long run, it was the most unexpectedly fortunate thing we could have done to prep for what was in our near future.

I don't know what will happen in the following weeks or months.

We expected to get married in Punta Cana.  Dan expected to start a new job right away.  We expected to see my mom and Dave around Thanksgiving.  We expected to go see Dan's family (especially his sister, Amy, and her new baby, Annalise) for Christmas.

Life is what happens when you are expecting something else to happen.  Be thankful for the small miracles that give you what you need for those times when life hands you something that is "not quite what was expected."

EPIC FAIL

Good Morning,

I'm going on 3 hours of sleep as I post this so please forgive any misspellings or bad grammar.

On Saturday, August 25th we left for Punta Cana, Dominican Republic.  We were supposed to be there for a few days by ourselves to relax.  Family and friends were scheduled to begin arriving on Thursday, August 30th.  Saturday, September 1st the rest of our wedding guests were scheduled to arrive.  Monday, September 3rd was to be our wedding day.  We would stay a few more days and leave September 8th; tanned, rested and married.

What really happened:
We did get there on Saturday, August 25th.  We did have two days before the trouble set in...  On Monday, instead of deciding which after lunch cocktail he would be indulging in, Dan went back to the room with an upset stomach.  I won't go into details but it's not a common problem that they see in a place where people drink too much and sometimes forget to not drink the water.  Tuesday, after some drugs and some extra fruit and veggies, we assumed all was well.  Thursday, guests started arriving and everything seemed to be on track.  Friday, after lunch and lounging by the ocean, Dan experienced some more pain.  Some very intense pain...

Friday evening we got to visit a hospital in the Dominican Republic.  After an ultra sound, some x-rays and a variety of other treatments - he was admitted.

Saturday we waited to hear from the doctor.  Hoping that he just needed an IV and then some prescription antibiotics and we would be on our way.  The doctor had other plans.  She had no intention of releasing him to go back to the resort.  She wanted us on a plane back to the US - the sooner the better.  While trying to digest the news, Dan's sister and brother-in-law showed up with a change of clothes.  Amy stayed at the hospital while I returned to the resort to scramble to see what the travel people could do to get us home.  I got to greet most of our family with sobs and violent shaking. I didn't get much done as far as getting home.  I did try but I was a bit disoriented and shaken.

Sunday, when the doctor came to visit, before she even asked if he was OK, she asked about our flight home (which we had none).  I returned to the resort and friends and family swooped in.  Courtney and Audrey called every comercial airline to find the quickest way home.  They even called the American Counsel in the DR.  Katie, who had packed our bags the day before and moved them into her room, helped as I walked from one end of the resort to the other SEVERAL times trying to use the phone and the internet.  When both of those failed and it was after 6 and I still couldn't figure out how to get us home, I lost it again.  Katie held it together until dinner but by that point the stress of Dan sitting in a hospital in a 3rd world country where the phones and internet don't work and no set flight home got to her.  Luckily, group support and white wine helped and I return to the hospital with no flight plans and nothing to show for my day of running around.

Monday, we get a call that we are on a flight for later that day to Pittsburg.  We scramble to get the latest flight from Pittsburg to Chicago, get our bags to the airport, get Dan checked out of the hospital with a menu of drugs (including a shot) and we actually make the flight to Pittsburg.  But... we miss the flight back to Chicago.  (By the way, if you are keeping track, this was supposed to be our wedding day.  We have it embroidered, engraved, painted on things.)  And we end up that night in a lovely Hyatt attached to the Pittsburg airport.

Tuesday, we get to Chicago, we get to Northwestern Hospital, and after a 5.5 hour wait in the ER waiting room we are seen.  The nurse listens to our story and tells us that it should be made into a movie.  After some tests and some waiting we are admitted to the hospital.  We get up to the room around 4am and after all the poking and prodding by new nurses, we got some shut eye around 5.

So the big question - what is wrong with him?
He has a 6 centimeter abscess in his intestines.  We've met with a few specialists and I'm sure there will be more. 

That being said, "Carly and Dan get Married" blog is somewhat of an epic failure.
Don't worry we'll post all of the pictures of everyone having fun.  It was really an amazing resort.

Much love to everyone,
Carly

Webcam update

Hello all!

Just posted a webcam view from the Dreams sister resort in Punta Cana.  In case you needed another reason to make it down in a few weeks.  See you soon!

Dan aka "Tech Supprt"

Less Than a Month

Followers, family, friends and those who wandered to this blog -

We have less than 31 days! 

September 3rd is right around the corner.  And yes, I have stated that the stress is starting to get to me.  But I do think that things are coming together.  Just a few more things to do.  I have a list and it's not terribly long.

There are still things that I'm worried about.  But most of them, aren't really 'wedding' related. 
I have a friend who is due right around a month from now.  We keep telling Baby Girl Rohde to come now or she's got to wait until 9/9 when we get back.  It's really something I don't want to miss. 
Our cat, Ripley (or more affectionately known as Momo) will be left alone.  She will be visited by my friend Chris and her brother Matt - but Mo is incredibly needy.  She yells at us if we are late getting home at night. She's going to be so mad.

And as of right now, the only wedding day thing I'm worried about is being hot.  I think that's a pretty good sign.  As far as actually being married... I'm ready.  But I'm not married, so what do I know?

The countdown is ON!

Starting to Get to Me

OK, so we still have a few things to do.  It's not like we have a huge list.  We have a handful of things left on the calendar I made while drinking wine.

BUT

It's starting to get to me.  What should go in our bags? Dan's shirt is sketchy see-thru, so we'll need to exchange because people will remove small children from his vicinity with the one he has.  I have bad tan lines already.  We've got to get Sally some lists.  I need emergency shoes.  I've got something new and something blue.  So something old and something borrowed are on my list.  I've got to get the songs that we would like for the ceremony.  I've got to get the readings to the readers.  Hair appointments, nail appointments, agree on a cake, vows, and who knows what I'm not thinking of...

So yeah, my stomach is acting up and I have an extra pimple or two and we've got 6 weeks until we leave.

Ugh.  I hope I last.

Crazy Brides

I read a forum with brides to are going to Dreams Punta Cana and brides who have been.  It's typically very helpful as they post pictures and describe different 'issues' that arise.

Some of these brides are asking how to get the chair covers and the center pieces - the favors and welcome bags - the menu cards, place setting cards, programs - and STUFF to the resort.  They are talking number of bags and boxes; having bridesmaids all carry an extra bag; shipping things to the resort.

Seriously?!  The reason I'm doing it this way is to not stress about the stuff that hardly anyone notices except the bride.  I do not think I will have the perfectly matched bow around the chairs.  I'm not packing up glass vases for center pieces just to stress about them all making the journey in one piece.  I'd like to keep it simple.

I want to show up, pick my flowers, show them a picture from a magazine of my hair and a cake and then be done.  I want my guests to show up and lounge by the pool/ocean until the stress melts away.  I want there to be a ceremony that represents Dan and I.  And then I want us all to have a fabulous dinner together, some dancing, some drinking and lots of fun...

Our wedding will be more about being there, together and not whether or not everything is PERFECT.  (Of course, I do kinda want my hair to be perfect...hmmm....must set up those appointments at the resort spa)

Dan asked me if I would be upset (OK, he asked if I would freak out) if it rained and we couldn't have it on the beach.  I said, "well, one of two things will happen - we'll have it inside or we'll have it in the rain."  I'm doing everything I can to keep calm, sane and excited.  Packing a ton of STUFF, dictating who is taking what, and stressing about it all getting there isn't on my list.

That being said; party goers expect relaxing, fun and simple.

"How's the Planning Going?"

We hear this question a lot.

The first to ask it with a bit of sarcasm was my Uncle Dave.

We saw him this weekend after several months.  Far too long, cause my Aunt and Uncle are really fun to hang out with...

They got married in St. Lucia.  They did the all inclusive.  They invited whoever and if you showed up, cool, if not, no hard feelings.  They did it a bit differently because they actually got married in the Catholic Cathedral on the island.  But they did ask, with a laugh, "how the planning is going?"

With just less than 90 days, there are still some things to plan.  Uh, we have to... Let's see... We need to... Heck, who am I kidding?  We have the welcome bags and Dan's attire.  We know what Dan will be wearing, we are waiting for another sale.  We have an idea about the welcome bags but we will need the final headcount before we order anything.

My dentist and very good family friend asked if I was getting nervous.  Kind of a trick question... I'm very excited about marrying Dan.  I'm very excited to take this next, very large, step.  I have no reservations about that.  I am nervous about silly things.  Will my dress be too hot? (yes, I'm preparing to be really HOT)  Will mother nature be kind that day? (really, out of my hands and I shouldn't worry) Will my guests be happy? (if you are on a tropical island where all you have to worry about is makings sure to apply sunscreen - I hope you would be happy)

So in all honesty - everything is perfect.

• We've got a few things to do and plenty of time to do them.
• We are both very exited to actually get married and BE married.
• And I, Carly, the worrier of the two, am making things up to worry about.

Dave and Mary - thanks for showing us the way.